Despite the fact that there is no ‘football culture’ (i.e., soccer culture) in the US to even begin to match the dazzling depth of football culture in other countries, we’re really rather familiar with the sport. I mean, I played it as a kid, and we’re talking about a bygone age when ABBA was still just a crappy hit band instead of a crappy hit musical turned crappy hit film (long before online slots were around for our entertainment, of course!).

There are soccer teams at pretty much every school in the country; evidence, hopefully, of our struggle to aspire to the International standard of evolved civilization. So we know the game. It’s just that most of us don’t really care about it unless we’re playing, and few of us choose to play when we’re not at school but for the most part it is a sport that takes the sideline after youth…

So it seems that we just don’t have the right kind of fans to craft a proper squad of football yobs. On top of the lack of interest mentioned above, we’d have to institute a more thorough welfare state, in order to give our budding yobs plenty of guaranteed – income free time. We’ll just need to keep them away from the great games at online casino USA when we do it…

We would need to recruit plenty of violent racist skinheads for one team and violent anti – racist skinheads for another team (or have alternates, for the ideal synergy of ideologically – fueled confrontation, no matter who was playing).

That in itself could be a problem. I suppose we could scape together enough racists, but they are rarely interested in soccer to begin with. We would definitely be lacking in leftist skinheads; most of our lefties are academic in nature, and probably opposed to team sports in principle as some sort of atavistic remnant of primitive warfare or something. In either case, trying to synchronize violent conflict around a soccer match would be extremely difficult, at least currently in this country. (That does not mean that it is not our full intent to try)

Plus, our racial problems do not have the habit of erupting during or around sporting matches. Oh, there are notable exceptions, (mostly at youth events and involving the parents) but for some reason the baseball, basketball, and football (sorry, I mean American Football) games are not quite the magnets for ethnic confrontation that football provides for other countries. It’s probably a serious mark against us that American sports have often paved the way for tolerance and empathy instead. What a crying shame if you ask some people… For others, this type of behavior is just fine.

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